Man abducted from Creekside. Tulipa triffida suspected...

I meant to post something about the marathon tomorrow - you know, stuff about how it's at the bottom of our road and how they're all Virgin's, and how the Duke over the road was serving marathon breakfasts (followed by marathon lunches, of course...) and that the fit ladies would be passing at around 9:36am but that the roads might be shut from such-a-such o'clock

HOWEVER...

...I'm afraid, I regret to have to inform you, that an innocent passer-by on Creekside was abducted between Ferranti Park and the Laban at 10:51 this Saturday morning and has not been heard of since.  Police suspect it may have been a flesh-eating tulip (tulipa triffida) which had escaped from a local Blue Peter garden and found its way into Ferranti Park.

Police have released this photograph in the hope that it will jog the memory of any member of the public who may have seen the attack:

But officers from Operation Trefleur were anxious to warn the public not to approach this tulip as it may be dangerous.